Nahal Zin, Negev Desert, Israel
Have you ever been weighed down by "writer's block"? Well, as most of you have noticed, it's been awhile since I last updated this blog and I apologize for that. My biggest reason has been that Stan took the camera to London and Turkey with him for his meetings. During that time, most of my time was spent with the boys or in language study. However, after Stan returned (with the camera) I ran out of excuses and basically had..."writer's block".
If I could describe to you what the last couple of weeks have been like for us, I would say a desert. We came here 6 months ago fully expecting to have most of our permissions in hand and our new airplane on its way by now. However, God has had other plans (What?! My plans are not His plans???). Yes, we've been able to spend more time in language study than we would've had things progressed as we wanted. But other than that, it just seems that we hit one wall after another. Not that we've heard anything negative...we just haven't heard...anything.
It's during these times that all of a sudden life just isn't easy anymore. The pollution becomes thicker, the dust more dustier (I realize that isn't correct grammar but it sure describes how we feel), the traffic more insane, the language harder, our living arrangements confusing, and so on and so forth...
I have been reading through the book of Exodus lately, and have been reading to the boys in the evenings, the first of Francine River's 5 book series "Sons of Encouragement"; "The Priest". It is about Aaron and how God used him mightily as Moses' right-hand man. It's been funny to hear the boy's reactions to the Israelites when they would quickly forget about God's constant and daily provisions, powerful displays of His glory, and perfect means of discipline. I know my reaction is, "OK, guys! God just rolled back the mighty sea for us, allowed us to walk through on dry land, and then killed all the Egyptians who dared follow us into the sea. He did this all right in front of our eyes. How can you forget that?!! It's not like we see this kind of miracle everyday." And then I would never EVER grumble against God. I mean, how could you forget something like that? That's pretty intense.
So tonight, after a few weeks of grumbling and complaining because of nothing happening, I read in Francine River's book (this is about Aaron);
"He was all too aware of the pattern of faith. He would witness a miracle and follow God in abject sorrow and repentance. God would seem to hide for a time and the doubts would begin. The people would start grumbling. Skepticism would spread. It seemed faith was strong when it suited the people's purposes, but waned quickly under the stress of hardship. God's divine presence was overhead in the cloud by day and pillar of fire by night, promising to carry them through defeat to victory, but the people grew angry because it wasn't soon enough to suit them."..."It was not the war ahead that threatened to defeat Aaron, but the daily step-by-step journey in the wilderness. Every day had its challenges. Every day had its tedium. We've been this way before, Lord. Will we ever get it right?" (pg. 100)
I guess I'm more like the Israelites than I care to think about. It's actually quite humbling as I think about it more. I am no better than what they were...Please forgive me, Lord. I am weak. Make me strong and help me to remember Your calling on my family and to prepare for when You next reveal Yourself to me.